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Have a heart.

 

Shoop” is a legendary song by the trailblazing hip hop group Salt-N-Pepa. We know the song, we love the song, we know the group and you agree with that first sentence I wrote. In the song Shoop the women espouse the same feelings about men.

Shoop isn’t looked upon negatively. The individuals within Salt-N-Pepa haven’t been vilified, boycotted, or taken to task for their lyrics. Salt-N-Pepa spent many albums man-ogling and telling men in no uncertain terms what they wanted them for.

Men and Women are different so shouldn’t their interpretations of similar things will also be different.

She raps “thank your momma for a butt like that.”
He raps “you got an ass like that from your momma.”

This is simply two different gendered people saying the same thing.  You’ll say it’s not but what you are really saying is that”She can get away with it but he can’t.” This is a double standard with all the agenda and psychotic trimmings. This is similar how women are more violent than men, but men are the only ones tagged with the violent label. Shoop was a sample of Ike Turner’s “I’m Blue”, how’s that for irony?

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Salt-N-Pepa here

Salt-N-Pepa’s song “Let’s Talk about Sex”, pretty much said the same thing, but people miss the point. There are thousands of songs by men showing their appreciation, like, lust of the female form, but not seeing the similarities in songs by females is not an industry problem; it’s a mental one.

Aaliyah goes Back & Forth while Lil Kim is being nasty as she wants to be. Khia can talk about her neck, back, and crack, where Nicki Manaj just so happens to put ice cream. Don’t overlook Beyonce’s drunk lovin’ or Foxy Brown’s sex without protection, disease infested. Liz Phair is fucking and running to Ciara’s Body Party. Trina maybe the realist chick, but Sheen Easton has those Sugar Walls.

Millie Jackson doesn’t want a halfway lover, but as Madonna said you can burn up from it. Iggy can give blowjobs for Louboutins, while Janet Jackson reminds the nasty boys that loves isn’t free. And by now, it doesn’t even matter how much Kelis charges for her milkshakes, because the double standard is real when everyone knows that whips and chains excites Rhianna.

Yet any male artist who utters something remotely sexual or unflattering is automatically labeled a misogynist. Maybe the blueprint laid out by Marilyn Monroe in Diamonds are a girl’s best friend was literal and not figurative.

These songs are reflective of the differences between men and women. Men aren’t and don’t protest songs where women lusting, ogling, body worshiping, showing them in a less-than-flattering light or shaming them. Men don’t protest those things not because they aren’t sensitive or that they don’t care. They don’t protest because they know it’s a song and you have a choice.

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Sometime you don’t want to feel, you just want a new purse.

“It’s so important that we let women express their sexuality and share their bodies.”K. Kardashian Sounds more like exploitation, but really how many times can you take naked photos of yourself and claim your are breaking the internet. How many times is it going to be about how you  look? If only people could take a selfie of their personality, social media would be the quietest place on the planet.

There are varying degrees to this sexual appreciation, but isn’t everyone different? Are men and women the same? Shouldn’t different points of views be appreciated for those differences not vilified, like Nelly was.

Forget the almost immediate call to the authorities when a males shows any hint of emotion…I wonder how many guys would be arrested if they dressed with their ass and flesh parts hanging out as a matter of liberation?

Women entertainers don’t have almost naked people dancing all around in their videos like men do. Some women entertainers are the almost-naked person dancing around in their videos.

These complaints from various groups and people are not about the entertainers having women on display in their video, it’s about the women displaying themselves and people being jealous of that display.

Of course we pretend like double standards don’t exist mainly because we benefit from them. There is also an anti-black-maleism is mixed into this topic in this also. How else do you explain Solange attacking Jay Z on camera and it being laughed off because it was o.k. to hit him because he’s a man. How do you explain Eminem’s lyrics vs. anyone’s…really.

 Misandry of the worst kind is the kind that goes about unchecked.

Women look men up and down, beyond his well-fitted suit, his lips, his hair, his shoes, and his wallet all the way to how he dances. Women look at men’s “packages,” watch men strut with sculpted muscle, sweating, pumped and shirtless. They watch the ones who grins because they look good with their shirts off and they watch the ones who don’t look so good with their shirts off. Women get a different, albeit less-obvious kind of eyeful, but an eye-full none-the-less. Yet it’s the men who quickly get slapped with some kind of condition or a syndrome for even acknowledging that they do the exact same thing.

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Here are the most popular searches for what people in the United States like…

Since women watch more porno than men, ladies what exactly is a porn addiction and what is the treatment for such a condition? I asked the question, knowing that no answer would come…

Some woman have made a name for themselves solely based on who they have slept with, but a man that has sexual encounter with multiple women is somehow a deviant.

Many women use vibrators like their is no tomorrow. There are married women who watch porn all day and other women who if they weren’t working would be watching porn all day, and they don’t have a condition, but Kirk Franklin does…

This double standard extends beyond music and pornography. Hillary Clinton said “I won’t play the woman card but I am a woman.” The largest allure of Hillary Clinton isn’t her policies, it’s that she gets to beat up on male candidates.

Karrine Steffans…AKA (SuperHead…don’t ask) said that Oprah and Maya Angelou were hoes…let’s see what happens when you publicly say it.

Many studies have found that women, without any legal restraints demonstrated a desire to control their partners and were more likely to use physical aggression than men.

 

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Is she still out there?

When the “terrorist” are women, society talks only of helping women and girls stay off this deadly path, while we launch unmanned drones to kill men and boys. Now that’s value…right there.

Women openly spank children and don’t get arrested, in fact most people are afraid to say anything to a woman who is disciplining her child. Someone is spanking a child in a crowded store and you need to go over four aisles to call the police…really.This powerlessness has lead to an industry of Spanking Shamers,people who openly say that people who were spanked as a child has mental issues.

If women didn’t support wars, there wouldn’t be any wars…try it and watch… Men would not be fighting other men if it weren’t for the vague notion of protecting their love. It’s violence by proxy because men are expendable.

This photo of Malcolm X carries a rifle while.peering out of a window in September 1964 issue of Ebony dramatized his defiance of threats. Contrary to what has been reported, he was actually hiding from an old girlfriend. Men are called deadbeats but bad mothers,just need a little help… She’s a stay-at-home mother, but she’s also single….ridiculous right…isn’t it all.

Tiger wood was hit with a nine-iron that fractured his cheekbone, by his wife…nothing was done, in fact he was ridiculed as the media tried to blame his injuries on a car accident. This being the case why would any male think that they would be viewed fairly? Recently Hope Solo and Britney Griner had domestic violence incidents and received a slap on the wrist for them, not so for male players, they lose their jobs.

There are more than 200 academic studies that show women are more likely to be the perpetrator in non-reciprocal violence. Since you may not read the studies that means females hit first and often, but it also means that if the male doesn’t take this kind of treatment and chooses to strike back…he then becomes the abuser. When women hit men it’s not being reported as violence, it’s views a being playful, emotional, she’s going through something or as the recipient deserved it.

People are people and no one wants to be hit by someone else, so why aren’t we as a society looking at them the same?

 

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Is it still funny?

What we will hear is a series of buts, someone muttering about pushing boundaries or role reversal, followed by lines that include copious use of the word “historically.” Women look at men as sex objects figuratively and literally, women are watching lots of porn, women are violent yet we pretend that it’s not happening.

There are laws that make infanticide a milder crime….why? Why are cities installing Safe Haven Baby Boxes, so a woman can just put her unwanted babies into these metal boxes?

We have slanted adoption laws, where women can at any time wash their hands of their kids with no consequences, financial or otherwise, to discourage infanticide, meanwhile men who walk away are jailed. Program on top of program exist supporting mothers, some of which aren’t good mothers, but men are put in jail when they are behind on child support.

Laws have been formed, jobs have been lost, and lives have been changed due to these glaring double standards. You’ll end up explaining how “Life isn’t fair”to children who will unavoidably grow up with a series of W.T.F.s in their head when they don’t have to.

 

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Today our society is not based on evidence and children grow up not understanding the whys in a land of equality and rules. Some grow up not understanding that they are somehow less than equal and the rules seem to arbitrarily be applied. As adults, we should know better. As parents, we damn sure should know better.

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There is a balance to everything

People notice how Former President Bill Clinton, who has been abusing and taking advantage of women for decades, remains one of the most beloved political figures in history. People wonder how did Ja Rule reached number one on the charts with lyrics such as, “I like to keep them drugged up on ecstasy”. While Rick Ross and Lil Wayne, in different songs, both hinted at putting something in a woman’s drink at a club, but for some reason only Rick Ross was taken to task for these lyrics.

In Chris Brown’s song “liquor,” a woman put something in his drink at a club and not one peep came from the masses. Is someone is telling the masses when to be outraged and who to be outraged at? Or are we a morally shallow society that allows double standards based on whether or not a person is liked? Either way that’s not a society built on rules, that’s a society built on enforceable whims.

For decades Oprah Winfrey has done many things to help people whether that help came from the Oprah show’s subject matter, giving her audience members cars or opening up a school. It can even be said her 2007 endorsement of Barack Obama is what put him over the top in his bid to become president of the United States of America. First let me be clear, I know that because of the amount of hair on my face that there is zero chance that I will be on Oprah’s show. That being the case, I have no problem with Oprah at all. Oprah Winfrey is an amazing woman who has overcome unbelievable odds to become one of the most powerful and influential people in the world.

The Oprah show is largely positive, but at times it is a show of sexual anxiety, victim hood, exploitation, and dark vision of sexual relationships. Strong positive Black Men are almost non-existent on Oprah’s show. On Friday, Oprah has a live show of weekly recaps and talks about current events in a round table type of atmosphere. On Friday Jul 9, 2010 a riot broke out in Oakland California, over the police shooting of unarmed Oscar Grant, a black man, that same day Oprah was on her show eerily saying “Huuugh Jaaackmannn… I love his butt.”

What is the Message?

On Friday, March 6 of 2009 Oprah had an intervention show for Rihanna, where she famously said “If a man hits you once, he will hit you again“, in a reference to the recent altercation between singers Rihanna and Chris Brown. Many of the singers acquaintances and friends spoke out on the issue. However, Oprah, at the time, did not know Rihanna and this show was done more than a month later. Chris Brown said that since he knew Oprah and had done shows for her, that he thought that she would at least lend a helping hand and not parade him through the mud. When Bebe Winans was accused to domestic abuse Oprah didn’t cancel his appearance on her show until public protect demanded it. No one is trying to defending Chris “Fake Tears” Brown, but Oprah’s message wasn’t really directed to Rihanna, was it?

The people she supports usually sit next to her, while the opposite opinion often sit in the front row of the audience waiting to be called upon When Oprah was in Africa she said “I will not rest until every black boy and black girl has a chance to prove their worth.”, then she opened up a school for girls only.

On Friday , July 16 2010 on the Gayle King show, in referring to Mel Gibson’s tapped conversations with ex-girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva, Oprah stated “Most men in America speak to their women like Mel Gibson.” She can only know this if she has her own Talk Show Patriot Act and she might.

On an episode with Lance Armstrong, Oprah said “I never got married because I just wanted to always be myself.” Every relationship is a risk and marriage is supposed to be an partnership between individuals.

One episode stated that 70% black women are single. Seriously, is this a fact or a feeling?

Another Oprah show said that 1 out of 3 men are cheaters. This may be a correct statement, but Oprah’s shows somehow make it seem that these “Cheaters” are cheating alone, or as if the person they cheat with never knew that they were married. Raise your hand if you really think that the women Tiger Wood’s cheated with didn’t know that he was married. Tiger was dragged through the mud and rightly so, but the “Home Wreckers” are still being celebrated.


Shows like: “Men who have beaten Women”, “7 ways to end violence” and “Red Flags” are only offered to make viewers believe that Men are the beginning and end any violent act. Many claim that her shows are about empowerment, but do shows like “Wish Away Cancer”,  “A Lunchtime Face-Lift”, “Turn Back The Clock”, “Thin Your Thighs”, “Cure Menopause!”, “Erase Wrinkles”, “Banish Obesity”, really empower anything other than ratings?

You are probably saying “He’s hatin’”, or more likely “what’s the big deal. It’s just a talk show.” Oprah is the most powerful woman in media. Her show is seen in countries all over the world. So if she is constantly presenting misinformation, and one-sided opinions of males, black men in particular, then the question has to be asked; is she aiding in the racism and abuse that black men face on a daily basis? It is her show, she doesn’t have to be fair, nor does she have to be balanced, but if this is considered normal then America is not a mentally healthy nation. Men and Women are to be valued. Men are as much a part of the equation as women are. What kind of answer to do you get when you only solve half of an equation?


For decades Americans have accepted marginalization of individuals and groups, and here is where Oprah is no different. Oprah Winfrey as well as others have, perhaps unwittingly, taught the youth of America that in some respects that it is okay to mistreat someone if you can claim victim hood. These types of cycles persist in America because many of the root causes are not exposed and addressed; they are ignored, distorted, or deflected. Perhaps we all should be taking the lyrics of Travis McCoy’s “Billionaire” song to heart. In order for our nation society, in order for nation to grow everyone needs to have value. Now more than ever Americans need equality not superiority and you can put that in your Fat Wagon and pull it.

By the way Oprah telling Barbara Walters that you wished you were white is nothing to be proud about.

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Part 3


‘Why Did I Get Married Too?’, is the sequel to Tyler Perry’s 2007 movie “Why Did I Get Married”. As many of my readers my know I try not to review Tyler Perry’s films because I have previously been compared to him, in some regard, and most of my reviews, while honest  have not been flattering.  The formula here is the same, couples bickering, exploiting emotions, and all of the marriage challenged have moral, ethical and relationship issues that usually get resolved by the time the movie is over and always with one character who is so horribly flawed that they are beyond redemption.

Honestly, Why Did I Get Married (2007) is when I thought that Tyler Perry had finally shown growth as a director, so I wanted to see this movie. The sequel’s story, though predictable, moves better than most of his films and the subject matter is still shallow. His films have marginally gotten better, but here we are almost 10 movies in and still Tyler Perry refuses to enlist real help with his film making.

This film picks up three years after the first movie, the four couples have moved on with their lives and are now taking their annual vacation. The location this time? The beautiful Bahamas. The couples all seen to be doing fine. Therapist Patricia (Janet Jackson) and her husband Gavin (Malik Yoba) have the perfect marriage and are moving on after the tragic death of their baby boy Noah. The workaholic Dianne (Sharon Leal) and her husband Terry (Tyler Perry) now have a little boy after Dianne had surgery to reverse the tubal ligation. Troy (Lamman Rucker) and Sheila (Jill Scott) are newlyweds and have moved from Colorado to Atlanta and have a little boy. Troy’s inability to land a job has put stress on the couple a matter which is complicated when Sheila’s ex-husband Mike (Richard T Jones) crashes their vacation. The ever mouthy Angela (Tasha Smith) and Marcus (Michael Jai White) are dealing with infidelity issues.

‘Why Did I Get Married Too?’ shows each of these couples attempting to portray that they have happy marriages, but before the vacation is over as we find out that real trouble is brewing. When the couples return home is where the couples face their problems head on.  Janet Jackson gives a nod to Tiger Woods in some very dramatic scenes. This film is where Janet turns in what I think is her best performance as an actress, sadly their isn’t much to see here. Now before you start thinking “he’s hating”, let me finish.

To say that this movie is cliché  and over the top are understatements, but what did you expect?  Sometimes the dialogue falls flat and the characters feel like they are on a stage instead of a beautiful island. There are several moments in this movie that will tug at your heart strings and tickle your funny bone. This is a film about relationships, love lost and found. Mr. Perry has continually assaulted my film experience since his arrival, and this movie is not totally good news for those waiting for the recently announced film “For Colored Girls”.  I said all of that to say that there is something about seeing the screen full of black actors and actresses that is refreshing… liberating even. There is something special about black people not being afraid of being black. This fact is something my fellow film critics will never get. Yes the Tyler Perry brand is formulaic and there are many things that can be said about his directing, writing  and acting. However, there is one word I have never heard someone say in regard to Tyler Perry, and that word is “Fearless”. And fearless is exactly what Tyler Perry is.  That is what ‘Why Did I Get Married Too?’ fully shows.  Fearless is what Mo’Nique showed by acting in Precious. Fearless is what Lee Daniels showed for directing that movie. They are all unafraid. So in that regard Tyler Perry thank you.

This movie gets a 7 out of 10 and that’s my Film Word.

This film is in theaters.